After several very difficult weeks of many trips to the office and colleague challenges as well, I decided that I had to do something different to make it through the days. I am a passionate, and energetic teacher. However, this has been leading to great stress and taking actions of others personally. If I am going to get through this year I need to shut down my emotions.
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This technique of shutting down didn't last long. Shutting myself down, emotionally, made me feel empty, and guilty of not doing a good job. The day that I let my guard down, it all came back against me.
I teach to help kids. So many of the students I work with have no one reliable to talk to. When a student comes to my room to talk, I do all I can to make time to talk to them. My room is also crazy most of the time with several students talking, and not usually appropriately, others needing help with school work, others needing to go to the bathroom, to their locker, or get a drink. This craziness often means that I don't always get the full story form kids, I help them first, figure out where they're supposed to be second. This lead to a tongue lashing from a colleague about students not being in her class. I addition, I was talked to about not letting general education students hang out in my room. I would like for every teacher to spend one full day, by themselves, in my classroom and really help the kids.
In addition, a student asked me about obtaining the Plan B pill. I learned later that I had to report that because she is only 16. I agree with statutory rape laws, and consent laws. However, teens are going to have sex. I would rather they talk to me, than not, because I have to report it. Thankfully, the student turned 17 the next day. The officer still had to report it to social services (under 18 in Wisconsin) but was most certain that it would not become an issue.
I would love to start an area hotline or even in person crisis service for teens that is anonymous. In addition to that I would also like to start one for parents.
In addition to the challenges I've had this week I had two parents e-mail me about their children. Both parents are at their wits end with their children and asked me to help. I have my own children that need me. I don't know how many more I can take under my wing. My momma duck wings are quite full.
For anyone that helps others, while it may be tempting to shut off all your emotions, it is not worth it. Those that you help, need all of you.
I know this was in Oct 7, 2014 - so a lot has changed since then and quite possibly all is well by now. An idea I had was being a Christian, we were to remember that Christ had a ton of Mercy, Grace, and Compassion. I know there were many other factors. I'm thinking like the state school rules, the fact states now a-days demand the separation of Church and Schools - so it obliterates and tries to omit any Mercy, Grace, and Compassion and goes straight to justice, shame, and ridicule. The whole thing gets to be silly, in my opinion. But you are correct, try not to shut down all of your emotions. They are what allowed you to be a teacher.
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